“Fear, uncertainty, and discomfort are your compasses toward growth.” ~Celestine Chua
Change is never easy, yet it’s always around us. Sometimes it hits us over the head (if you experience the end of a relationship, a career change, a move, or a loss of a loved one). Other times, it’s hiding around the next corner. And most of the time, it’s happening even when we don’t realize it.
What about the transition period – that tricky time “between” when you decide to make a change (or have change thrusted upon you). I’m talking about that time you feel a bit in limbo, when it feels like your life is on hold. Transitions can sometimes feel like we are stuck, though it may not actually be the case.
Yesterday, in church, my Pastor spoke of change and transition. It really made me think of my last year. I have had so much change, that it has actually made me go crazy at times. The most important lesson in the sermon was how we make plans and we expect those plans to happen on our time table. However; God has his plan and it doesn’t always fall in line with our plan. We have become such a fast paced, want it now society, that we expect all to fall into place on our time table.
A year in a half in my life change and transition, I find myself in another career, and personal transition. I absolutely love my life coaching business and I love what I do every day. However; I noticed I wanted to cling to something I knew to avoid….uncertainty. I am now teaching again, part-time, which I love, and it’s a steady paycheck. Let’s face it, with your own business, not everyone pays you when they should.
After pouring through several graduate school websites and clinging to the idea that finding certain work was the answer, I realized I needed time to be in transition, even though I’m terrified.
I needed time to heal and time to just be. The last two years of my teaching career were a nightmare, and now, teaching part-time, takes a hit on the ego, but it is the most positive experience I could have asked for. Was this God’s plan? Did I follow my gut in faith because I needed to see that what I endured in my last two years of teaching was not the normal behavior on how a boss treats a teacher? Maybe? Whatever the case may be, I know it wasn’t me and I have one of the most supporting staff and principal. That has certainly helped the healing process of the bullying and harrassement of my last principal.
The idea of being in transition made me quite uncomfortable, I knew I needed to sit with it, find my way through it, and finally become friends and a little more comfortable with transitions. I am not sure any of us can ever become best friends with transitions. They suck! But if we can gain positive reflection out of them and grow, then they can be a friend.
For a while, I hated when acquaintances and former colleagues would ask, “What are you doing now?” or “WOW, it took guts to resign”, I would cower under that question and try answer what I would be sure would impress them. However; the truth of the matter was, I was earning my Life Coaching Certification and starting my own business. OF course, I was doing this on my retirement money and 100% starting over. Talk about a jump of faith of a cliff.
On the whole, our society is fixated on success and having plans in place that we are rarely encouraged to take a time “out.” Once I stopped judging myself, people’s questions seemed a lot less important to me and I was able to relax into my transition a little more.
I Have Been Through All of This Transition and Together I CAN Help You. We will make a plan, however, we will also focus on why you are where you are, how to get you to where you need, and the positive attitude and outlook it takes to endure all of this. E-mail me @ liveinconfidence@gmail.com or go to my website to schedule your FREE 30 minute session to see if we fit to work together on your life circumstances. www.BeckyShaferliveinconfidence.com
Doing the work to overcome such transitions is the key in moving forward. Being patient, letting go of the past and enjoying the moment are key life tools we would work on in life coaching.
dealing-with-transitions-worksheet
Becky Shaffer-Adolescent/Adult Life Coach/Educator/Author